Some thoughts…
New year is here and hopefully it will bring much happiness with it. Would be truly nice it that was the case for all my friends. That’s why I feel so down when some of my friends, almost aways the same one… Doesn’t even seem to ask how it is, or try to cheer me up when I’m depressed. I just read something this friend wrote and it got me started thinking about what it said in that text, and if that only applies to a certain other friend or in fact all friends. Because to my knowledge none of the other friends feel that way. I know this sounds harsh and mean, but seriously just hearing some encouraging words or asking how it is, could have helped me thought a bit of my depressions. I’m not even sure my words are coming out the way I’m thinking it in my head. They may seem harsher or ruder here, but hopefully my friends knows me that well to know, it’s not what I meant.
I’m not saying its always like this, but for most of the times. And I might be reading into stuff to much, but that’s pretty easy to do when you are depressed and it keeps growing. People who don’t suffer from this kinds of severer depression where you have to take medicine to feel normal can hardly understand what’s going on. I do know I might not be a very good friend, but I try and I have my problems that sometimes get in my way. Of either taking contact with people of even have the energy to do so. And my “wonkiness” or “awkward behavior” are just side effects of my insecurity, I don’t know how to act in front of people and I get nervous and “flip“. I hope you all can understand and accept that, that’s not something I want to do. It’s like an automatic defense mechanism.
Yeah… I have my problems otherwise I wouldn’t take medicine to feel okay. And I appreciate all my friends, then one I have in real life, the ones I have on internet. And for the ones in real life, you mean a whole damn lot to me. You are among the reasons I’m still alive today, because you wanted to be friends with me. And while its not perfect (nothing is) I just hope, that sometime you could send an sms asking how it is. I know you are having a hard time too, but talk to me and we’ll help each other. That’s what friends are for, right?
To some this must sound really gay, but I really needed to vent these feelings.
But I appreciate that we can spend time together and play games like old days. Or take on video games we haven’t played yet and go though then together. I’m not sure you will even read this, but I really value our friendship you where my first real friend and I do feel like you should understand me best. But I know that can be hard, when I don’t even understand myself. Please don’t take my text here the wrong way, I just needed to vent some thoughts. I hope we’ll continue to be great friends forever and thanks to all who wants to be my friend. It means more to me than I can ever express.
Tags: Depression, Friends, Thoughts, Valuable
Blue Dragon: Shadows, Magic & Eternity
I just finished playing Blue Dragon, a great game! I first played this game around 2009, but just played it for 2-4hours. But now almost 3 years later I played it from beginning to the end. It took me around 37hours to clear this game, I spent a few of those ours training my shadows so I could take on the last boss. I was so under-leveled that he owned me hard, time after time…
Once a year, violet clouds appear and bring with them disaster. For Shu’s hometown Talta, they bring the yearly land sharks. Shu’s friend Kluke lost her parents to the land sharks and together with Jiro these three kids are trying to take it down for good, so the people of Talta don’t have to be afraid anymore. They get dragged away by the land shark and this will lead them to find Nene, the evil mastermind behind the land sharks. And other evil doings, being cast aside by Nene, a mysterious voice tells them to swallow the light spheres that has appeared before them. It will grant them magic, to fight against Nene. After a small hesitation they swallow the light spheres and their shadows transform. They gain the form of mystical animal, apparently having a shadow like this is proof that you can use magic. Now with power, they can right the wrongs Nene has done in the world.
This is a pretty simplified/short down version of how the game starts, I don’t want to give it all away and to explain everything as it exactly goes down would take an eternity.
The battles are pretty standard JRPG, turned based just like Final Fantasy. And speaking of FF, this was one of the reasons I wanted to play this game. Since its made by the father of the Final Fantasy series, Hironobu Sakeguchi. With Nobuo Uematsu doing the music and doing one hell of a job with that! I’m probably one of the few who actually really like the boss song “Eternity” I really feel like this game game is a spiritual successor to the Playstation 1, Final Fantasy games. With a more cartoony style of course. And ‘m looking forward to trying their other game Lost Odyssey, which seems to be even more inline with being a spiritual successor to the FF games.
I really enjoyed this game, it’s been a long time since I played a classic JRPG. And one that was good and enjoyable! 2012 is of too a good start when it comes to games so far and I’m currently going through my old save file of Tales of Vesperia, which I think I’m near of nearing the end of the game. Well, there where a few stuff I liked in the Blue Dragon anime more than, I liked in the game. In the anime, the shadows all have personalities and are “alive” so to say. While in they game, they are just a form/symbol for magic users. I might go deeper into the differences of the anime and game later, or just post what I liked and disliked about them. I was expecting them to be the same, but boy I was wrong. Its just about the characters and the shadows that are somewhat the same, the story is way different in the anime. Well, as I said I might go deeper into that in a later post. If you have an Xbox 360 and want to play an good old JRPG on a modern console, I can highly recommend Blue Dragon.
Tags: Anime, Beaten, Blue Dragon, JRPG, Review, Thoughts, Xbox
The one game I really want…
I should be pretty excited about all the upcoming games and I am. But there is actually one game besides all of the upcoming ones I want even more. I realized that tonight when me and my buddy Kntheking where talking. What could this game be that has me more excited than both White Knight Chronicles & Final Fantasy XIII? The answer to that is Tales of Vesperia. I am a very big fan of the Tales of series and has been since i played Tales of Symphonia on the GameCube.
I’ve been dying to try this game for so long now, but without an Xbox 360, is more or less impossible. And there are no funds in the nearest of months (or even under 2010) to buy anything like that. And as time passes it seems less likely that the Playstation 3 version will be released outside of Japan.
But why am I this hyped for the game? Honestly I can’t answer that, I just have a very strong feeling inside my whole body when I think of this game. It may sound cheesy or strange, but that’s the only way I can put it. The Tales of games have always made me feel better when I’m playing them, there is something there that I just love. With the exception of Tales of Legendia, which I do not like at all.
So just knowing its out there and waiting it actually kinda hurtful… The way and the longing I feel for Tales of Vesperia is something I haven’t felt in a long time.
I won’t put any hope in the PS3 version coming out here, I don’t have the heart to hope for something like that. I’ll just get depressed then. I’m just hoping I’ll be able to get a hold of an X360 version of the game later, so I can play it. They seem to be getting pretty rare… I really do think its amazing you can feel like this over a game, but I can’t help the way I feel. I hope I’ll get to play the game soon and that it will be just as great as I think it is.
